http://music.aol.com/video/time-of-your-life-good-riddance/green-day/1358748   


On the last Saturday in May, 1960 in South Sioux City, Nebraska, I marched down the aisle with my graduating high school class to Pomp and Circumstance. On that same day, 50 years later my grandson Caleb walked in Knoxville, Tennessee to the same music. With my graduation money I bought a transistor radio for $25.00. Although inflation and the amazing increase in tuition should be figured in, Caleb could have paid for all four years of my out-of-state tuition with his graduation money. After the ceremony, my Mom and Dad took my sister Ginny and me to the Green Gables for Gosh Awful Gooeys. After Caleb's ceremony, his Mom, sister-in-law, family friends and I fed Mexican food to 100+ people. Change is constant, but the ceremonies remain the same.

I don't remember any stirring words or inspirational messages from my ceremony fifty years ago, and really don't remember any from two weeks ago. Commencement is still too long, too wordy, and too solemn to contain the exuberance simmering under those bright blue caps and gowns. At Caleb's ceremony there was, however, a sweet highlight of kind words spoken and heartfelt hugs exchanged as each graduate received his/her diploma from their parents. Most speeches were brief and to the point, with one long-winded exception that sent nudges and eyes rolling across the auditorium. That over-zealous dad provided a "you wouldn't believe this one guy" story to retell for years to come.

Our party in the park was a long time in coming. My daughter Bridget and I began planning in March for what became an exercise in careful shopping, intricate logistics, creative refrigeration, reliance on the kindness of friends, and sheer endurance. The day after I arrived in Knoxville we focused on pork and beans. Every available crock pot and heavy pan was filled with simmering pinto beans. Four eight pound pork butts roasted in Bridget's oven with another four at the church. Rice filled any empty burner and everyone that wandered through the kitchen chopped their share of tomatoes, onions, and sweet potatoes. We ate dinner Thursday night surrounded by mounds of pulled pork, trays of cooling rice, and pans of refried beans. 

We scurried on Friday morning to bake the Tres Leches Cake and mush the guacamole before the remainder of the family arrived. By Friday night our numbers were up to twenty: nine adults, seven children, one baby, and three dogs—each  expecting at some point to be fed. My daughter-in-law Lara did just that—with a meal-ready spaghetti dinner complete with sauce, pasta, garlic bread, and cupcakes. For Bridget and I, weary from the battle with pork and beans, seeing Lara come up the driveway was akin to catching sight of the cavalry riding over the hill to save the circled wagons.

Saturday was the big day. At the first break in the brief (not!) ceremony, Lara, Mary Elizabeth, Sydney, Ansley, and I skedaddled to the park to set up. As we drove into the parking lot, we could see unfamiliar milling bodies, open coolers, and unfolded "soccer chairs" in our reserved spot. Not to be daunted, Lara approached the somewhat unfriendly group with the posture and manners of a genuine steel magnolia and had them on their way before you could whistle Dixie. With only a few skips in our getalong,  we decorated, unfolded, plugged in, displayed, and served the party goers. Our group evenly divided itself between 50 or so fit, constantly moving Ultimate Frisbee players and 50 or so not as fit, lounging, spectators until nighttime darkness finally nudged us off the field, out of our chairs, and into our cars.

The Batchelor family was the perfect host—welcoming, casual, generous, and engaged. Caleb, the perfect graduate—involved, spontaneous, and gracious. All in all, a successful celebration of a young graduate's entrance into the complex mystery of adult life.


Connie Batchelor's Mississippi Mud Cake

2 sticks butter
1 1/2 c. flour
2 c. sugar
1 1/2 c. nuts, chopped
2 tbsp. cocoa
1 c. coconut
4 eggs
7 oz. jar marshmallow creme
1 tsp. vanilla

Mix all very well except marshmallow creme. Bake at 350 degrees for 30-40 minutes. While cake is still hot, spread on marshmallow creme from side to side.

FROSTING:

1 stick butter
1/2 c. milnot
1 tsp. vanilla
1/3 c. cocoa
1 box powdered sugar

Cook the first four ingredients on the stove for 2 minutes. Remove from heat and mix in sugar with blender. Beat well. Spread over Mississippi Mud Cake. 
 
I didn't really read this recipe through carefully the first time, so what the heck is "milnot"? Well, it's a brand of evaporated milk sold primarily in the South. Here's what my go-to-guy Google has to say, "

Is Milnot the same as Sweetened Condensed Milk?

No, Milnot is not an equivalent or substitute for sweetened condensed milk (SCM). Milnot is a substitute for evaporated milk. Milnot is a milk-based product that has had the butterfat removed, and replaced by vegetable oil. SCM is evaporated milk + plenty of sugar.